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πŸ“‰ The Jobs Report From Hell

The robotics takeover isn’t β€œstarting”…it’s exploding.

AI surgeries. Self-driving delivery networks. Military robots. Automated warehouses. The technology is scaling faster than any traditional sector β€” and the market caps are still tiny compared to where they’re headed.

β€’ Tech driving real adoption across medicine, defense, and logistics
β€’ Under-the-radar tickers getting upgraded fast
β€’ Anchored in a $200B+ megatrend that could mint the next wave of market winners

If you wait, you’ll be late.
If you act early, you’ll be positioned.

β€” The Stock Alert Daily Team

β˜•οΈ Happy Saturday, Munchers! My wife asked what I'm doing working on the weekend. I said "providing financial insights to thousands of subscribers." She said "so doomscrolling Twitter and calling it research?" Semantics aside, let's take a step back and look at the big picture of this absolute trainwreck of a week.

πŸ“‰ The Week From Hell: War, Oil Spikes, and Jobs Vanishing

Wow. I feel like I need a vacation from the back and forth week we just had. Since we all thankfully made it to the weekend, let's take a step back and see where we're at in the big picture.

πŸ’£ The War Situation (Or: How We All Got This Very Wrong)

Remember when everyone said this Iran thing would be quick like Venezuela? In and out, minimal disruption, back to normal by Tuesday? Yeah, about that.

We're a week in and it's becoming painfully clear that's not happening. The White House bet on a short, aggressive four to six week timeline for "Operation Epic Fury" to wrap things up nice and clean.

One problem: Iran's not interested in cooperating with our timeline.

Their Foreign Minister basically told the US to pound sand, saying Iran sees "no reason" to negotiate after the U.S. attacked them during peace talks in Geneva. Because nothing says "let's negotiate" quite like bombing someone mid-conversation. He also dared the US to put boots on the ground, warning a ground invasion would be a "big disaster" for American forces.

Translation: This is dragging on way longer than four weeks, oil's staying expensive, and everyone who bought the dip thinking this would be over by now is currently regretting their life choices.

πŸ›’οΈ The Oil Shock (AKA Why Your Commute Just Got Expensive)

This is really why the market's freaking out. Higher oil prices hurt everybody except your local gas station and oil refineries who are having the best month of their lives.

The Damage:

  • Global oil prices have surged 16% since the war started last week

  • Gas prices at home jumped 27 cents in a single week to $3.25/gallon

  • That's an extra $5+ every time you fill up, which adds up fast

Trump’s response?

He brushed it off saying "if they rise, they rise." That has the exact same energy as when I tell my wife I'm going golfing Sunday and she says "sure, do whatever you want." Both statements sound like permission but are actually detailed threats with consequences that will be revealed at a time of her choosing. I've made this mistake before. The couch was involved.

🩸 The Weekly Damage

Zooming out, this was officially the worst week for Wall Street since October.

  • The Dow: Suffered the biggest weekly loss, dropping a massive 3%.

  • The S&P 500: Closed the week down 2%.

  • The Nasdaq: Ended the week down 1.2%.

  • The Russell 2000: Collapsed by 4.1% over the last five trading days.

The Munch Take: Listen, these aren't apocalypse numbers. The indexes are only down a bit. But that's the average, which means plenty of individual stocks are getting absolutely obliterated while the big names hold everything together. We bought the index this week and added more Bitcoin because apparently we enjoy stress. For now, we're sitting on cash, pretending we're Warren Buffett, and hunting for discounts. Is this disciplined value investing or just fear disguised as strategy? We'll find out when we actually deploy the cash or chicken out entirely.

Dear Fellow Investor,

The Iran War didn't just make headlines.

It broke the gold market wide open.

Gold is already above $5,000 and surging.

But the metal isn't where the real money gets made.

There's one tiny company sitting on more gold than France, Italy, and China combined.

It moves 10x faster than the metal.

And right now, it's still trading at a 99% discount to what it's actually worth.

A briefing with the ticker is waiting for you.

"The Buck Stops Here,"

Dylan Jovine, CEO & Founder

Behind the Markets

BIG PICTURE

πŸ“‰ The Jobs Report From Hell: When -92,000 Becomes the New Normal

Wall Street expected the US economy to add 60,000 jobs in February. Instead, it lost 92,000. That's not a miss. That's a catastrophe.

The Carnage:

  • Unemployment ticked up to 4.4% from 4.3%. Not great, but the real horror show was in the revisions.

  • The Government Lied (Again): December's job numbers got slashed from a gain of 48,000 to a loss of 17,000. Total job growth for all of 2025? Revised down from 584,000 to just 181,000, making it the weakest year since the pandemic. Translation: everything they told us about the economy recovering was a lie.

Where Did the Jobs Go?

  • Healthcare: Lost 28,000 jobs

  • Federal Government: Cut another 10,000 jobs (330,000 total since October 2024)

  • Manufacturing: Down 12,000 despite tariffs supposedly protecting domestic jobs

  • Construction: Down 11,000

  • Tech/Media: Down 11,000

When you factor in all the revisions, the US labour market has averaged basically zero net job creation over the past six months.

The Stagflation Nightmare:

This is the Fed's worst-case scenario. The labour market's dying, but they can't cut rates to help because the Iran war is spiking oil prices and reigniting inflation. When growth dies, but prices rise, corporate profits get crushed.

The Munch Take: Jobs are vanishing, gas prices are climbing, and the Fed's completely trapped. Welcome to stagflation, where everything's expensive and nobody's hiring. What a time to be alive.

πŸͺ Munchy Memes

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