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☕️ GM Munchers! The market giveth, and the market taketh away. Mostly taketh, if you’re trading on vibes like I did yesterday.

On today’s menu:

• 🚨 Wall Street Legends Just Sounded the Alarm

• 🚀 United Health Bounces Back

• 📢 MFF Beats the CFTC – And It’s Not Even Close

• 😍 The Funded Trader Index

• 😎 Retail Traders Are Buying The Dip

Yesterday’s numbers:

BREAKING NEWS

🚨 Wall Street Legends Just Sounded the Alarm

There are days when the market feels like a calm ocean.

Then there are days like yesterday where you're sitting in a canoe, watching Jamie Dimon yell "tsunami" while Ray Dalio lights a flare.

Let’s break down three of the biggest stories shaking things up right now:

💣 Dimon & Dalio: Sounding the Alarm

Two of Wall Street's most influential voices are screaming caution.

JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon warned that markets are wildly underestimating the risks of inflation, deficits, and tariffs. He sees stagflation (recession + rising inflation) on the horizon and thinks investors are way too chill about it.

Ray Dalio, meanwhile, says Moody’s U.S. downgrade understates how bad things could get.

Why?

Because it doesn't even account for the Fed printing money to pay debts, which could devalue Treasurys even more. Translation: the U.S. might not default, but you might get paid back in Monopoly money.

🧵 Plan English Play: Big names think markets are sleepwalking into risk. Watch those high-multiple stocks and stay alert for macro shocks.

📈 Why Bond Yields Matter (Yes, Even for You)

If you think bonds are just for boomers and pension funds, think again. Here’s why:

• When yields rise, it means borrowing costs go up—for everyone.

• The 10-year and 30-year Treasury yields are benchmarks for everything from mortgages to corporate loans.

• Higher yields = tighter financial conditions = pressure on stocks (especially growth names).

Bond yields are also a barometer of market sentiment:

• Rising = risk-off, fear of inflation or deficits

• Falling = risk-on, rate cuts, growth optimism

Yesterday, the 30-year briefly topped 5% and the 10-year hit 4.521% after Moody’s downgrade. It didn’t last, but the spike shows just how edgy markets are. If bonds start selling off aggressively, everything else (equities, crypto, commodities) could get dragged down with them.

🧵 Plan English Play: I know we’re banging home bonds on the daily and they’re boring, but watch the yield curve like it’s your trading account. It’s one of the cleanest tells for sentiment.

🇺🇸 The U.S. Debt Downgrade: What’s Really Going On

We covered this yesterday—but here’s the fresh juice:

• Moody’s cut the U.S. from AAA to Aa1, blaming ballooning deficits and interest costs.

• It was the last major agency still handing the U.S. a perfect score.

• Analysts now say this could signal deeper structural rot.

Even the Fed’s divided. NY Fed’s John Williams says the downgrade changes nothing (classic). Atlanta’s Raphael Bostic admits it could hurt investor appetite if things stay messy for another 3–6 months.

Our take? This smells political. Are we seriously saying the U.S. is less creditworthy than Canada or half of Europe? Come on.

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MARKET OVERVIEW

🍿 Tasty Movers & Shakers

$UNH ( ▼ 0.35% ) just had its best day since 2020. What’d we tell you? As Mohnish Pabrai puts it—opportunity lives where nobody’s looking. The unloved. The ugly. The stuff your trading group mocks.

$QQQ ( ▲ 2.18% ) is flying off the April lows… but it’s now the most overbought it’s been since July 2024. Tread lightly, breakout bros.

$GOOGL ( ▲ 2.45% ) Waymo just got the green light to expand robotaxis in San Jose. We’re one step closer to getting ghosted by a car instead of a driver.

$GM ( ▲ 0.7% ) says it’s done exporting cars to China. Translation: they’d rather quit than get wrecked by tariffs.

PROP FIRMS

📢 MFF Beats the CFTC – And It’s Not Even Close

The biggest prop firm lawsuit in history just got nuked.

On April 30, a federal judge recommended dismissing all charges against My Forex Funds — and sanctioned the CFTC for acting in bad faith.

Translation?

The regulator withheld key evidence, made false claims, and got caught red-handed.

The court even ordered the CFTC to pay all of MFF’s legal fees.

How bad was it?

An internal email proved C$31.5M was a legit tax payment… and the CFTC hid it for months while claiming it was fraud. The judge called their actions “careless,” “sloppy,” and “inexcusable.”

And the fallout was immediate:

• Commissioner Mersinger resigned hours after the ruling

• Staff placed on administrative leave

• Acting Chair Pham torched her own agency, saying they acted “willfully” and thought they were “above the law”

Why Traders Should Care

This is a massive win for the industry — and a warning shot to regulators.

If you’re a prop firm trader? This case could pave the way for:

• A potential MFF comeback (👀)

• Legal precedent limiting regulator overreach

• More transparency (and maybe fewer gotcha shutdowns)

No word yet from MFF on next steps, but the legal path is clear. The CFTC just got humbled — and the prop firm world may never be the same.

Bottom line: Turns out, David can slap Goliath... especially when Goliath forgets to read his own emails.

TRADING STATS

😍 The Funded Trader Index

Today’s top trade bagged $6,195 on EUR/USD in just 6 hours.

The worst? A 1-lot Bitcoin long that torched $1,558 in 3 hours.

Biggest payout processed? $630.

Lesson: same-day payouts hit harder when you’re not donating to the market.

🚀 Pre-Market Fuel

1. 😎 According to JP Morgan, retail traders are buying the dip at record rates.

2. 🏚️ Mortgage rates are climbing again, back over 7%.

3. 🤑 Michael Saylor bought more Bitcoin. It was a big purchase, at $764 million.

4. 😍 Costco’s stock is just off the charts.

5. 😏 Warren Buffett’s biggest buys.

🍪 Munchy Memes

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